Can't Trust Anyone In This World

Never trust any one with anything cause in the end they most likely won't be there for you! They Will turn their back on you...some may fight for you...some may die for you...but most will just turn around and walk away. They may seem like they love you in the beginning but then they begin to change and you notice the difference more and more everyday. Always think before you take action and always remember the only people you can really absolutely trust are your family. Cause in the end there really is nobody else out there.

I seriously hate feeling like this. It feels like crap. It feels like nobody loves you or nobody is there for you in the end. Which I know that I have Trudy, Mychelle, and Michael. But I don't know if that is enough. I finally realized tonight how much of an idiot I am for loving a person so much when they hit me yelled at me and tugged me around. And I realized how stupid I was of doing some things while I was with that person that I really shouldn't have done and I wish that I wouldn't have but what is done is done and when I finally told that person what I had done (when we aren't even together anymore) they say they forgive me and that they could never hate me not even one little bit then the next day go off and tell some guys that I am a slut, a hoe, and a bitch and that he was going to hang me. How wrong is that?! That is f**king sh*t. It is so uncalled for. I mean I can understand him being mad at me and everything but if you're mad then tell me right then and there and don't lie to me. I would rather know the truth then a lie. It hurts way less in the end if you know the truth.

When I asked him if he was with this girl he says no we are just friends and then the next day one of my best friends tells me that she saw him giving her a kiss on the cheek and it wasn't just a friend kiss it was a passionate kiss and that they went to lunch together...it hurt me. Cause I did still love him at the time but then he said that night that he didn't do it and that people are just trying to start drama cause they hate him and want to ruin his life. Well then I see him the next day and the day after that and the day after that and so forth going to lunch with her. So I confrunt him about it. He says ya I go to lunch with her but we are just friends I promise. Then he keeps saying he needs to talk to me and everything and so one night I go with him and we go to the park and everything and do some things and ya then that Monday(today *2/2/09*) some guy opens his mouth and says something about it and he says no it's not true she just doesn't want me and sarah to be together I asked her out on Friday(the night we went to the park) but that Saturday I sent him a message and he replied back that he wanted to ask me out that day but I had told him about everything that happened while we were together and he said he just didn't know anymore. So you tell me does that make much sense or what?! It doesn't to me. He either needs to get his crap straight or stop lying to me. One or the other. But quite frankly I don't care anymore. I could care less of what he does with his life he can go kill himself for all I care. He is out of my life and lets hope it stays that way!! He was just a peice of shit to begin with and I wish I would have never laid eyes on him. He was just a waste of my time. Although he did help me to see that there is someone better out there for me and that he will treat me right and that I can actually be myself around him and have fun. I have finally realized that everything happens for a reason and this all happened so I could see that I really do deserve someone better then a use to be pot smoking, drinking, smoking cigarette, dipping snuff mother fucker! That doesn't give a shit about nobody but himself. Thank You Very Much For Showing Me The
Real World! I will always remember you but you will never have a home in my heart again. Goodbye forever and always!